Topshop ‘Kerb’ red patent leather t-bar shoes

Over at The Fashion Police, I write a lot about what I refer to as the “Dress Like a Toddler Trend” – i.e. adults wearing clothes which look like they’d be much more at home on a small child. Hats with ears and anything that can be described as a “onesie” all fit into this category, and so, I would argue, do these shoes. OK, they may not be quite right on a toddler, exactly, but I had several pairs of shoes that looked very much like these when I wasn’t much older than that, and when I came across them on the Topshop website, I actually thought I’d stumbled onto a site for children’s clothes instead.

From this, you can probably tell that I’m not keen on this look at all, and I think it would take some clever styling for these not to infantilize their wearer in one easy move. Could you do it, do you think? What would you wear with them, if so?

(Click here to buy them)


  • Goodness, those are so similar to the shoes I wore to primary school – I feel about 5 just looking at them!

    I do like the red patent, I have to say, and I can imagine as a child I would have whooped (yes, whooped) with joy to own such a beautiful pair of shoes! I do quite like them – but they are erring a little too far towards the “toddler” end of the scale, even for my comfort-loving feet. However, were I to wear them, I think I’d probably go very student chic. Baggy jeans (not hanging off my arse baggy, more flarey) and a simple jumper and tshirt combo. Definitely NOT with a dress or skirt, I think.

  • my 5 year old Ruby LOVES these shoes, the fact that she already has them in navy may have someone to do with it!! I enjoy a Mary Jane or t bar (with a classic heel) but even I feel that these are only suitable for primary school kids!!
    If Alexa Chung gets herself a pair then you can be they’ll sell out regardless though!!
    Loving your posts shoepergirl!!!
    L x

  • Used to wear shoes similar to these all the time in my late teens/early 20s, usually with tight tops and long skirts. (Most of my shoes actually were children’s shoes, but when you’re size 2.5/3, sometimes you haven’t got many options) The outfits, surprisingly, worked, though I don’t think that would be the case these days when I’m pushing 30.

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