OK, I’m using a little bit of hyperbole in the title of this post: I can’t claim to speak for ALL shoe lovers, of course, but if you have a large (or even just a larger than average) shoe collection, I’m willing to bet you’ve heard at least one of these questions a few more times than is really necessary…
“BUT WHAT DO YOU DO WITH THEM ALL?”
I’ve been asked this question more times than I can count, and now just answer with a deadpan, “I wear them on a rope around my neck: is that not what I’m supposed to do with shoes?” Seriously, though: what ELSE would I do with shoes, other than wear them? Sure, I have a lot of pairs to get through – but I do actually manage it, as my regular Shoe Challenges demonstrate!
“YES, BUT CAN YOU ACTUALLY WALK IN THEM?”
I understand that heels aren’t for everyone (I provided some tips on how to walk in them here, if you’re interested), but asking me if I’m able to walk is a little patronising. I’d have to be pretty stupid to buy this many pairs of shoes if I wasn’t actually able to stand up in them, after all!
“WHY DO YOU NEED SO MANY?”
The short answer to this one is that I don’t: no one actually NEEDS lots of pairs of shoes. I do WANT them, though, and that’s why I buy them – just like how some people buy lots of video games, or model trucks, or whatever it is they’re interested in or collect. I’m sure they don’t actually “need” those things either, but if they want them, and can afford to buy them, who am I to judge?
“HOW CAN YOU AFFORD THEM?”
I was brought up with the idea that it’s impolite to question people about their personal finances, so I’m always taken aback when people demand to know how I paid for my shoes. I don’t ask people where they got the money for their new car/recent vacation/expensive meal/shiny new gadget, because it’s none of my business. Why is it THEIR business how I pay for my shoes?
(For the avoidance of any doubt, though, I pay for them with money I earned from working: the same way most people buy things…)
“DON’T YOU EVER THINK ABOUT HOW THAT MONEY COULD HAVE HELPED CHARITY INSTEAD?”
Following on from the “how much did they cost” and “how can you afford them?” questions is often another question which isn’t really a question at all: it’s just a way of trying to make me feel guilty by suggesting that there are “better” things I could have/should have spent my money on than shoes.
Again, I find it odd when I’m asked to justify how I choose to spend my own money, and I also resent the assumptions people are making here about me. How do they know I don’t ALSO give money to charity? (I do, for the record: I just don’t blog about it…) Buying shoes and donating to charity isn’t an either/or kind of thing: it’s not the case that someone can EITHER buy shoes OR give to charity. Actually, you can do both if you want to, and just because someone spends money on something frivolous, it doesn’t mean they’re automatically a bad or selfish person: for all you know, they could be donating twice as much to charity (or more) than they spend on shoes – and it’s none of your business, anyway.
As with the question above, I don’t go around people’s homes asking them why they bought that couch, or this flatscreen TV, when they could have donated the money to charity instead, or trying to make them feel guilty for owning an iPhone, when some people in the world are starving. Shoes aren’t the only luxuries people can buy, and if you’re going to start down the road of telling people they shouldn’t buy anything that isn’t essential, and should donate every spare penny they have – well, you better be practising what you preach!
Do you relate to any of these? Got any other shoe-related questions you’re sick of being asked?
Yep, relate to all of them! My sister always berates me for the volume of shoes I have – yet she owns 25 bikinis! 25! And she only goes on holiday once a year, and doesn’t swim in between. I just don’t see how that is any different! Someone also recently said to me, in a scalding tone, “you’ll have to get rid of them when you have children!” Um, why?? Do they pose some safety risk I don’t know about?? Are babies allergic to shoes?? Or does it become illegal to wear anything other than scruffs once you have given birth? I don’t know what it is about collecting shoes in particular that people find so bemusing!
They might hurt themselves with a stiletto, or stick into a power plug? I really have no idea! Are your feet going to be swollen forever? I would have made a very confused and scared face and asked the person why, as if I hadn’t noticed the tone.
(I lived in a small island for 18 years and can’t remember anyone with 25 bikinis. Over several years, yes, but only because by September they were all scruffy from all the use and needed a replacement!)
Apparently some people find their feet change shape forever when they have children – they go up a size, or their feet get wider or something: just one of the many reasons pregnancy and childbirth absolutely terrify me! I also know a lot of people who believe it’s not possible to move quickly in heels, so you can’t wear them when you’re “running around after a toddler all day” – I don’t know why that means you have to actually get rid of them, though, as opposed to keeping them until the baby’s older, or for times when you have a babysitter or something!
All of those. And I don’t even have many…
About the “how can you afford them?” one, at least when I get that question, it’s usually an *actual* question from people who want to have more shoes too, think they have a similar budget to mine (a student’s one), and want advice. Then I tell them it’s a matter of spending enough time during sales browsing ALL the shops until you find the last pair of OTK at Zara for 30e instead of 200e, that just happen to be your size (true story! my first pair, I’m so much warmer in winter since I found them…), or something similar. They don’t usually like this answer. I suppose that’s why personal shoppers have jobs!
I’ve never had the charity one but I do tend to hear the othets
I’ve never been asked the charity one but do get asked a lot about how many do I have (honest answer – not a clue but it passed the 300 mark a while back! :-s ) and then where do I put them all (most are under my bed or in a big chest, the pairs of manolos get their own shoe display)…. The cost one annoys me so I just usually point out that I don’t smoke or drink alcohol so this Is my vice instead; and a much healthier one at that!
Yes i’ve been asked about the cost by people who have the same budget as mine and “what do you do with all these shoes” and “why do you need so many”. But I get the same questions with nail polishes ( i do have many). yes I wear them and yes I like to have so many different colors and not just one or two to chose from ! Some people just don’t get it ! Like Mariana, about the budget i just think i’m a better shopper and bargain finder than most people !