You’ve probably seen these boots before. They got a lot of publicity when Prada released the leather version earlier this year, and I have to admit, I’m a bit horrified to see them now available in suede, too.

I hate boots like this. If you’re a reader of The Fashion Police, you’re probably already aware of my deep-seated aversion to boots-pretending-to-be-shoes, but these are particularly alarming to me given their resemblance to a prosthetic leg. I can’t help imagining what they’d look like lying on the floor when you’d come home and kicked them off: pretty frightening for the next person to walk into the room, that’s for sure.

Also: what if your legs aren’t exactly the same colour as the “flesh” part of the boot? Won’t that look even stranger?

For those of you who’ve managed to remain blissfully unaware of these boots up until now, here’s a quick reminder of what the leather version looked like:

I like the “shoe” part of the suede ones more, purely because of the higher heel and less clumpy shape, but at the same time, at least the leather finish looks a little bit like human skin, while the suede just… doesn’t. Unless you have slightly furry skin, in which case… yeah.

What do you think of these, folks? Do you need a pair of fake prosthetic legs in your life? Seriously? OK, up to you: they’re $1,400 at Saks, and you can click here to buy a pair.