1. Charlotte Olympia Coquette Poodle-Head Slide

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    shoes with fluffy poodle head embellishment

    Charlotte Olympia poodle slides, £517

    Uh-oh: the poodle is back!

    You didn’t like the last pair of “poodle shoes” I showed you from Charlotte Olympia, and I very much doubt you’ll like these ones any better, but if a fluffy apricot poodle can’t brighten up your Wednesday morning, what can, I ask you?

    OK, so these may not exactly have brightened up anyone’s day, but although I wouldn’t buy them myself, shoes like this always fascinate me, purely because I just can’t imagine who would actually buy them. Oh, I can imagine someone buying them if they were CHEAP, and then either wearing them as a joke, or maybe even because they REALLY like poodles, but the fact is that these are £517, and oddly juxtapose an elegant evening sandal with what looks like a stuffed animal that’s been cruelly beheaded. Are there really people who’d look at them and think, “Yup, I know where my £500 is going this month!” And if so, can I meet them, because I bet those people have a story or two to tell, seriously.

    Regardless of what I think of them personally, though, I just can’t be mean about them, because they have a FACE, which means my mind has already attributed feelings, and a personality to them. And now I feel sorry for them, so I better end here before I convince myself I should buy them, just to make it up to them…

    Buy them

  2. Miu Miu turquoise satin platform sandals

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    turquoise platform sandals turquoise satin high heels

    turquoise heels

    Miu Miu turquoise satin platform sandals, 475 euros

    Very chunky sandals don’t normally do it for me, but these ones had me at the beautiful, turquoise colour, which held my attention for long enough to get me thinking that, actually, the overall shape isn’t half bad, either. In this case, the chunkiness is the very thing that gives the shoes impact: on a strappier sandal, that wonderful colour (Which, by the way, Miu Miu call “pavone”)  would seem a little more subtle, but these allow it to take centre stage and, well, show off a bit, basically.

    These have a 5″ heel with a 1″ platform, making a walking height of 4″. The fact that they use a thick heel rather than a stiletto should make them feel fairly stable, and there’s also a substantial-looking ankle strap for added security. With a colour as bright as this, I’m always tempted to go for the safe option, and style them with a neutral like black, white or grey, but I also think they’ll lend themselves rather well to some of the  floral prints which are always around at this time of year, for a dressed-up summer look.

    Buy them

  3. Friday Fix Flashback: Christian Louboutin Moon Bow pumps

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    blue Christian Louboutin peep toes with bow

    I came across this photo earlier in the week, and even although these shoes are years old, and no longer being made, I knew I had to feature it as this week’s Friday Fix.

    These, you see, are Christian Louboutin’s Moon Bow pumps. They were the very first pair of Louboutins I ever saw “in real life”, the first pair I fell in love with, and the main reason I became interested in the brand which was to become my all-time favourite. They’re basically the reason the Friday Louboutin Fix exists, in other words.

    It was the year of my wedding. My mum and I were shopping in Glasgow for some wedding-related things I’ve long since forgotten, we walked into House of Fraser, and there they were. “My” pair (I still think of them as mine, even although I didn’t actually buy them) were red, rather  than navy, which made them even more fabulous. Add in the sexy shape and that fabulous little polka dot bow, and I was completely blown away by them. Until then, I’d seen Louboutins in photos, of course, but I’d never seen the real thing, and it was just SO MUCH BETTER than I’d imagined. Even now, I think these shoes are far better in real life than they appear in photos: even the chunkiest shoes in the collections are always slimmer, lighter and more elegant than you expect they’re going to be, and just all-round fabulous, basically.

    I didn’t buy them.

    Oh, don’t get me wrong: nothing would have made me happier than to wear a pair of bright red Louboutins on my wedding day, but the budget was already stretched to the max, and there was no way I could possibly have justified the cost. I still think about them to this day, though, and they remain my favourite Louboutins of all time. If they were ever re-released, well, I’d have a hard time resisting, let’s put it that way.

    So tell me: do you have a favourite pair of Louboutins? Which were the ones that made you love the brand (assuming that you do, of course!)?

  4. Brian Atwood Coraline flower sandals

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    flower sandals in snake print

    Brian Atwood ‘Coraline’, $1,295

    I’m mentioned before that I’m not a fan of snakeskin, or other reptile prints, and I’d actually go so far as to say that I actively DISlike it on shoes, bags, or really anything other than the animal it belongs to (or is inspired by, in the case of prints). This, then, is the only way I’d consider wearing snakeprint shoes: when the print is used in very small doses: so small, in fact, that I didn’t actually realise it WAS a snake-print until I zoomed in. Even then, I’d probably like these better without the texture on the leather, but I like the small flowers crowded onto the simple leather strap, and twining their way around the ankle.

    This is a design that could be a little busy if you’re not careful: I’d probably wear these with a block colour, rather than a print – luckily there are lots of colours for you to choose from on the flowers themselves – and an outfit with very simple lines.

    Buy them

  5. Giuseppe Zanotti red suede bow platform pumps

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    red platform shoes with bow on heel

    large red bow on heel of shoe

    Giuseppe Zanotti red suede bow platform pumps, £553

    Sorry for the low-quality photos, folks: the original images of these shoes were very low-res, and I couldn’t find better ones, so they probably look pretty blurry to you. I’m hoping the shoes themselves will distract you from the images, though, because just look at those heels!

    That amazing, oversized bow at the top the stiletto heel isn’t just distracting me from the blurry images here, it’s also doing a lot to distract me from the front of the shoe, which is just too darn big for my taste, with an almost 2″ platform to balance out the 6.5″ heel. If they had a more streamlined shape I’d definitely be calling these Kryptonite: as it is, they just miss out on that particular title, but only just – and I bet if I were to see them actually being worn, I’d probably change my mind!

    I love the lipstick red uppers on these, but the combination of bright colour and giant bow is too much for you, these also come in black.

    Buy them

  6. Sophia Webster Loren Bauble-Detail Glitter Pumps

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    silver glitter shoes with bauble embellishment

    Sophia Webster ‘Loren‘, £344.33

    These shoes seem a little out of place in April. Everything about them, from the glitter-ball uppers to the Christmas tree baubles (in festive red and green, no less!) screams out “Christmas” to me, and that’s not something I generally want to think about in December, let alone at the start of Spring.

    Still, people have special events to attend all year round, and not just at Christmas time, and if your event seems to be crying out for a pair of fabulous, glitter-covered shoes, then look no further. These have a beautiful, slender shape, and a 4″ pin heel, so they’re slightly more elegant than some glitter shoes I’ve shown you. And if nothing else, I guess they’d make an excellent gift – for yourself, naturally…

    Buy them

  7. Casadei purple and blue captoe heels

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    Casadei purple captoe pumps

    Casadei purple high heels

    Casadei, £420

    One shoe, two (slightly) different looks…

    When I first came across these Casadei pumps, I loved them for their purple suede uppers and black captoe style: this is a look we saw a lot of last year, but it’s such a timeless look that it never really goes away, and that’s just fine by me, because I love the way a capped toe has the power to transform an otherwise unremarkable pump.

    Not that these ones are unremarkable, of course, because when you turn them around, you find a bright blue section on the inside of the shoe: it’s only just visible in the top picture, but instantly grabs all the attention in the second one, making these a lot more interesting than might otherwise have been the case.

    Ordinarily, purple, black and blue would sound too much like a bruise to make me want to wear them all at the same time, but I actually think Casadei have made them work really well together. What do you think?

    Buy them

     

  8. Friday Fix: Christian Louboutin ‘Flueve’ Pointed-Toe Slingbacks

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    black pointed toe shoes

    black pointed toe slingbacks by Christian Louboutin black patent shoes with asymmetric toe

    Christian Louboutin ‘Flueve’ Pointed-Toe Slingbacks, £432

    These shoes will inevitably make some of you cringe in horror, while others swoon in delight, and it’s all because of that old issue: toe cleavage. Some of you love it, some of you hate it, but these are designed to showcase as much of it as possible, so if you have both feet (clad in non-revealing shoes, naturally) firmly in the “hate it” camp, these definitely won’t be for you. If you love it, meanwhile? Read on…

    These are Christian Louboutin’s ‘Fleuve’ slingbacks, and they’re also available in taupe. In addition to the toe cleavage, these also showcase the very pointed toes that have been back in fashion for a while now, and which are used to particularly lethal-looking effect on these shoes. I love the asymmetric shape of the vamp, which swoops around to form the perfect curve on the side of the shoe. Add a slender, 4.5″ stiletto, and you have exactly the kind of shoe that made Christian Louboutin famous, and which he still does so, so well: a classic pump, which somehow manages to be so much more stunning than the words “black slingback pumps” suggests.

    Buy them